JULY: Tortoises take over and special guests fly in to Jersey

Tortoise Takeover. Janvrin's Tortoise by Jamie O'Neill on St Catherine's breakwater. Picture: JON GUEGAN. (37032534)

A heroic dog, a giant hare and a (baby) shark in a swimming pool. Richard Heath looks back on July – a month when silly season well and truly got under way.

“WHAT’S that, Lassie? There’s a fire outside and it’s threatening to spread into our home and we need to get out as soon as possible?” That is (sort-of) the conversation the Jones family had with their dog, Floki, when the clever canine tried to alert them to impending danger as flames started to creep closer to their St Clement home on the night of 10 July. In reality, they actually told him to be quiet – until it dawned on them that something was amiss. “At first we were saying ‘Floki, shush’ but then we realised he was not barking like he normally would – he seemed frantic – and we went down to investigate and could smell smoke,” said Rick Jones. Writing on Facebook, his wife Samantha added: “Big shout out to our amazing pooch who woke us last night to tell us there was a fire. We were able to wake our children, get Floki out and alert our neighbours thanks to him and my wonderful man, Rick.” Floki was rewarded with lots of strokes – possibly an extra Bonio – and a front-page picture in the JEP.

But he was outdone in the same edition by an even bigger picture of a hare. The two-metre tall sculpture, painted by artist Nick Romeril, was part of Durrell’s Tortoise Takeover trail, which was keeping children and adults alike entertained during the summer holidays.

The Tortoise Takeover hare in the Royal Square. Picture: ROB CURRIE. (37032553)

According to the front-page of the JEP on 4 July, “Jersey’s wildlife is under serious threat from a rapidly changing climate which has seen the Island record one of its hottest ever starts to summer”. The UK’s Wildlife Trusts warned that nature was being “pounded by extreme weather” and locally experts said that insects, hedgehogs and birds were struggling following weeks of warm and dry conditions in June. But if they were feeling the heat, they’d soon have at least a couple of months to cool off, as summer packed its bags at the start of July and didn’t return until the kids went back to school in September. The chilly and wet weather covered much of northern Europe, while Spain, southern France and Italy baked in near-record-breaking heat.

With all that wind and rain, there were fewer swimmers in the Havre des Pas bathing pool – which was fortunate, as it had been infiltrated by a shark. Well, a catshark. Also known as a dog fish. Which was just a couple of feet long. But the diminutive visitor did at least give people something pretty to look at while plucking up the courage to immerse themselves in the choppy waters.

The silly season – that two-month period at the height of summer when everyone is on holiday and journalists are in the grips of a news drought – always results in more offbeat stories finding their way into print. And perhaps the strangest of all this summer was the tale of the stolen planks of wood. A police investigation was launched after decking worth £2,000 was apparently stolen from outside the Rice Bowl in St Clement. Three days later, the mystery thief returned, slung most of it into the restaurant’s car park, before coming back with the rest a short time later. In a Facebook post, the business described the thief as “Jersey’s most-wanted man” but urged Islanders to go easy on him, adding: “No smear campaigns and definitely no being dragged down King Street naked and pelted with rotten fruit please”.

Tunnel closure. Picture: JON GUEGAN. (37032767)

If the crook had tried to make his getaway through the Tunnel, he would have been disappointed, because the government had closed it (but didn’t exactly go out of their way to tell anyone in advance). Hundreds of motorists were stuck on queues which stretched as far as Georgetown (in St Saviour, not Washington DC) when the westbound lane was shut to allow for some sewerage work to take place. The government apologised, admitting that although it did put up a few signs and posted a couple of lines on gov.je, “further public communications should have been issued”.

Tributes were paid to author, historian and environmentalist Peter Hellyer, who died aged 75. And the Island also said goodbye to much-loved former Deputy and businessman John Falle, who founded a car hire company which was once the largest in the Channel Islands. Mr Falle, who died aged 96, was the Deputy of St Saviour for six years after topping the poll in 1963.

There was surprise when it was announced that 90s boyband Five had been booked to play Channel Islands Pride later in the summer… Not because no one thought the organisers would be able to sign a chart-topping band, but because it was assumed the group had quit and gone their separate ways years ago. They were, however, still very much active but, confusingly, now only had three members.

In a similar theme, The Progress Party announced it had officially disbanded. The party had made the exact opposite of progress since launching in 2021, and was left with just one sitting member (Deputy Steve Luce) following the 2022 elections.

Artists Nick Romeril with HRH Princess Anne and Lieutenant-Governor of Jersey Vice Admiral Jeremy Kyd CBE. Picture: MATTHEW HOTTON. (37032817)

The Princess Royal popped over for what is beginning to feel like an annual visit to the Island. During a whistle-stop tour, she dropped in at the Zoo, where she opened the new giant-tortoise enclosure, Mont Orgueil Castle and Government House.

And Islander Hannah Maden-Adams was left feeling like royalty… after discovering she was the only passenger on a Blue Islands flight. After checking in at Ibiza Airport, she soon became aware of a puzzling lack of other travellers. A short time later, she found herself being chauffeured from the gate in a private car and offered her choice of seat on the plane, before the pilot doubled up as a tour guide, pointing out various locations during the two-hour flight back to Jersey. And when she touched down, she had a personal escort through border control, which had been opened especially for her as she was the only international arrival. Ms Maden-Adams unwittingly secured the VIP treatment after booking a seat on what is known in the aviation industry as an “empty-leg” flight. In this case, she had flown out with another airline from Heathrow, and then booked the return leg of Blue Island’s first summer flight to the Balearic island.

Hannah Maden-Adams with one of the pilots and cabin crew members Halle and Lana. (PICTURE: HANNAH MADEN-ADAMS) (37032885)

The reception wasn’t quite as welcoming for politicians as they made their way through the Royal Square and into the States Building on 5 July, when teachers staged a protest as part of their long-running pay dispute. The demonstration was held during a day of strikes as teachers rejected a 7.9% pay offer.

And Johnny Vegas – known for his broad Lancashire accent, acerbic comedic rants and surreal sense of humour came to Jersey… to show off his ceramic art. Mr Vegas – better known for his appearances on shows including Celebrity Juice and 8 out of 10 Cats Does Countdown than his skills on a potter’s wheel – put his work on display at Private & Public’s Phillips Street gallery.

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