By Stephen Le Quesne
LOVE. It is a feeling and an emotion like no other, one that is relatively new to me. Love tests you, builds you up, challenges you and makes you a better person. I never believed that I would fall in love, In the past I was always more of an island, protecting myself from trauma, forever in fight or flight and never wanting to settle. What sparked the change? Therapy, lots of it, and the courage to face up to my demons, but that is a story for another time.
Love is something that we need more of right now. The honest kindness that it brings, and the boundaries it tears down are the antidote to the onslaught of negative emotions that seem to be constantly bombarding us.
Being dedicated and connected to a person humbles you, it takes you out of your own emotions, your own bias and grounds you like nothing else, something I have had to learn and am still learning. I am also incredibly grateful to be loved back, something as well that I have had to learn to accept, to embrace and to feel good enough for. I know that what I have is special and there is a determination to keep a hold of it and to grow with it.
The thing is we seem a bit wound up at the moment. Anger, frustration, hate and not a lot of patience. We are bombarded with too much information, it’s too easy to say any opinion as quick as you wish and get validation for it. It’s a siege mentality and it is hurting us all.
The current biggest instigator of hatred towards others is Nigel Farage. He needs to be called out more. His hypocrisy is startling. He is a parasite, feeding on people’s anger, fears and frustrations to further his own cause and to line his own pockets (according to estimates he is earning more than £1m from the work he does outside of being an MP). Communities and families have a right to be angry at inequality, at a lack of opportunities and to feel abandoned because their village, town or community is being left behind, but immigrants are not to blame. Who is? Individuals who work tirelessly to keep the status quo, who profit from environmental destruction and who earn obscene amounts of money.
We should focus this anger and frustration for positive democratic change, a different way that turns our backs on people like Farage, as it is their economic beliefs, their hoarding of power and wealth, their wanton destruction of the planet that has put us in this cycle of anger and emotional bearpit. Mr Farage and his allies were the architects of Brexit, one of the most foolish decisions of the 21st century where an electoral population decided to make itself poorer. And yet this ultimate opportunist is allowed to carry on with his hate and dishonesty.
Do you ever read a book that is so good, that you stop reading it. so, you do not finish it. I am currently in that position with a book called “Our Wild Calling” by Richard Louv. The book focuses on fascinating stories of human-animal interaction, exploring our deep bonds with animals and how connecting with animals can transform our lives and save theirs. It is the importance of love again, the vital role that connection to others in person brings, whether that is an animal or a person. I do feel that we are slowly losing these connections.
Louv says that “Our relationships with other-than-human-beings can have a profoundly positive impact on our health, our spirit and our sense of inclusiveness in the world”. I agree, I 100% agree. Some of the most profound memories of my life evolve around experiences with wild animals and connecting to them, whether that be elephants, lions, dolphins or one of my family pets who has long since passed. Why can’t we bring this sense of connection and belonging to the people we do not know? Why do we need to judge? Why do we need to make an instant opinion?
The chapter I have finished reading focuses on the work and impact of therapy animals. In the chapter we meet Naomi and her “service” dog Koba. His job? To help regulate and soothe Naomi when she is struggling with her autism. Their love and understanding of each other is absolute, their story inspiring and humbling, full of connection, warmth and kindness.
My love and connection to my partner and for wildlife has helped me to heal, to connect to who I am and every day it challenges me to turn my focus away from my opinions, my automatic biases, my thoughts. To be selfless.
We are animals in a world of animals. We need community, we need communication, we desire warmth, security and a sense of belonging. We can get this from the natural world, from the people around us, not by joining in with the hateful speech of others.
Stephen Le Quesne is a naturalist and outdoor learning instructor.
