After the news that the Bayeux Tapestry may finally be displayed in the UK, one Twitter user has been having fun creating some alternative tapestries based on famous moments in English football history.
The Bayeux Tapestry is over 950 years old, is 70 metres long, and depicts the lead-up to the Battle of Hastings, the battle itself, and William I’s victory over King Harold II, known as the Norman conquest.
But why not create an updated version or four? Using an online tool to design some modified alternatives, @CheapPanini has created a few tapestries that might ring a bell with fans of English football, rather than English history.
Cantona’s kick
Not sure why but I made a Bayeux Tapestry version of Cantona’s kung-fu kick pic.twitter.com/3kQ6cKgSRJ
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 18, 2018
First up, a tapestry depicting Eric Cantona’s famous kick at a Crystal Palace fan. In January 1995, Manchester United v Crystal Palace was goalless, when Cantona received a red card.
As he walked from the pitch Cantona was seen launching a kick at a spectator, resulting in a nine-month ban, fines from United and the FA, and 120 hours of community service.
As for the tapestry, check out this ancient Premier League logo.
100% legit Premier League logo pic.twitter.com/ZHkvU5BeQz
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 18, 2018
And how about these pundits of the past?
Left to right: Jimmy Hill, Alan Hansen, Des Lynam pic.twitter.com/qtlDNjrlfb
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 19, 2018
Hand of God
And now a Bayeux Tapestry version of Maradona’s ‘Hand Of God’ versus England in 1986. pic.twitter.com/xNeSeQ2Juj
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 19, 2018
England’s quarter-final against Argentina at the 1986 World Cup saw two goals that changed football forever, both from the same man.
It was Argentina’s Diego Maradona who put his side 1-0 up with the most dubious of goals, scored with his hand, before doubling the lead with the Goal of the Century.
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 20, 2018
Lineker halved the deficit nine minutes from time, but England couldn’t find an equaliser and were knocked out. Oh mate.
Italia ’90
So, here’s our attempt at an Italia ’90 Bayeux Tapestry
( With sincere apologies to @GaryLineker ) pic.twitter.com/fj69HvQJbw
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 20, 2018
The 1990 World Cup in Italy saw further tears for England, but as the tapestry illustrates, England weren’t the only team of interest at the tournament.
Benjamin Massing’s tackle on Argentina’s Claudio Caniggia and an unsavoury moment between West Germany’s Rudi Voller and the Netherlands’ Frank Rijkaard are featured.
Gary Lineker makes two appearances on the tapestry, although unfortunately, not for his goals.
Euro ’96
Have now attempted a Bayeux Tapestry Tale of Gazza at Euro ‘96 pic.twitter.com/dW9gHeThbU
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 23, 2018
And last but certainly not least, the 1996 European Championships were hosted in England and so nearly provided tournament glory. In the end it was penalty defeat to the Germans again, but some fun was had along the way.
Not least Paul Gascoigne’s well-crafted goal against Scotland in the group stage, and the dentist’s chair celebration that followed. A handsome goal, according to the tapestry.
‘Tis Cominge Home‘Tis Cominge Home‘Tis ComingeFootballe’s Cominge Home??? pic.twitter.com/mveIPL9lXL
— Panini Cheapskates (@CheapPanini) January 23, 2018
Might England’s performance at the 2018 World Cup be worthy of a tapestry? Fans can only hope.
