COMMENT: It's not only the Lycra-clad louts who are a dangerous nuisance

Moi? Perish the very thought. When it comes to my comments about cyclists they are the epitome of moderation when compared with the language, crude gestures and frankly threatening behaviour from that minority which seems to think that not only is there safety in numbers but riding round in a pack allows them to bully everyone else on the road.

But, as those pedestrians who use streets in the centre of town will testify, it’s not only the posses of Lycra-clad louts who are a dangerous nuisance.

I was crossing the Royal Square the other morning, having spent a pleasant half hour sitting on a bench watching the world and his brother go by – and not recognising more than a small handful of them, but that’s another story about the changing face of this small rock – when this pin-striped, suit-clad bloke on a cycle clipped the back of one of my hands as he sped passed me.

To his credit he did stop but I was a bit miffed with his inference that somehow it was my fault because, as he put it, ‘I didn’t know which way you were going to go’. Me pointing out that the incident would have been avoided had he not been cycling was met with a look that suggested I’d just grown another head, and off he went, still weaving in and out of the paths of pedestrians.

It’s perhaps because of that incident that I smiled as I read the recent letter about the use of bells by cyclists to warn other road users of their presence and the practice in California of those on two wheels giving what the correspondent described as a ‘polite verbal indication’ that they are nearby.

I’d dearly love something like that to work in Jersey but I’m afraid that the pigs are fuelled and ready to fly. The most you are likely to get here is a shout of ‘out of the (choose your own expletive) way, I’m coming through’.

JERSEY’S deserved reputation for its hospitality is renowned the world over but it still delights bolshie (but proud) little crapauds like me when it is publicly acknowledged by individuals and bodies away from these shores. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has absolutely nothing to do with the Airport – I can’t remember the last time I used the place but it was some time ago – who was nonetheless pleased that the prestigious United Kingdom Aircraft Owners and Pilots Association had awarded it its ‘best aerodrome’ accolade.

The association praised the Airport’s outstanding facilities and helpful service, saying that it makes a significant effort to accommodate them. ‘Jersey Airport stands out as a busy airport that manages to provide an outstanding service to general aviation visitors and residents alike,’ said the association.

Now that’s the sort of praise about Jersey which I like to hear and I hope that something appropriate is placed at the Airport – preferably near the arrivals hall – so that it can be seen by everyone arriving here. It’s the sort of publicity which makes an impression.

SO, Home Secretary Kristina Moore tells us that the next police chief might come from within the force or he (or she) might not. Current chief officer Mike Bowron announced last month that he intends to retire in September but what no one seems to be saying is whether or not during the six years he’s been here he was charged with the task of identifying and training a successor.

I’ve lost count of the number of times that I and very many others have all but pleaded with those who tread the corridors of power to make such a task a prerequisite when people are appointed to jobs at this level, but no one seems to want to listen.

And finally… When is someone going to sort out the Health Department because it appears to me that neither the managerial nor political hierarchy are either willing or able to do the job. According to the Jersey Appointments Commission, senior staff within the department were appointed without the proper procedures being followed. Will heads roll?

Don’t make me laugh.