MY New Year’s resolution this time around was not to make a New Year’s resolution at all. I’m not sure if I’ve kept it or not!
As ever, at the beginning of this month, there was a flurry of ideas from people looking to improve their lives or situations with a change of habits to mark the change of year. Plenty of those aspirations were good, healthy or admirable ideas. But there also seems to be a growing number of people announcing that they’re going to change their lives ‘by putting me first’. Invariably they follow this proclamation with ‘for a change’ as if, Mother-Theresa-fashion, they have spent their entire existence at the beck and call of others, ministering to the sick and suffering with no thought for their own wellbeing or health.
I’m not sure where this attitude has come from, because it certainly wasn’t around when I was a youngster. ‘Me Time’ seems to be an ambition of the 21st century, and to be blunt, it seems a pretty selfish one. We already live in an awesomely self-obsessed society, without the need for additional aspirations towards egocentric indulgence.
With five children to look after and a house to run, I can’t imagine that my mother had much ‘Me Time’ throughout her entire life; indeed, the very concept of it would have been alien to her. What was important was family time, and making sure that every one of her children felt loved, well cared for and valued; that’s not to say that she wouldn’t have breathed a sigh of relief once we were all tucked up in bed, but any free time left at the end of the day would have been used to sew on name tapes, darn socks or to make sure that satchels were prepared for the day ahead. We’ve already seen a revolution over the past few decades, with time-saving devices streamlining the relentless housework that kept previous generations busy from dawn until dusk, but still we consider that we deserve more down time.
In this age of extreme marketing, it is hardly surprising that the world brand leader is prefixing the names all of its most successful and highly selling products with I. We’ve the iPhone, the iPad, the iPod, all of which are trouncing their competitors due not only to the strength and effectiveness of the merchandise, but also the means by which they have been promoted to a self-centred generation. And what better use could there be for your iPhone than to take reams of selfies and then distribute endless pictures of the aforementioned subject enjoying copious amounts of me-time in a variety of situations. It’s me, me, me, all the way!
Of course we all need a break from the stresses and strains of 21st century life where working hours are long and pressures intense, and cutting off for a short while to recharge the batteries and refresh the senses has to be a good thing, but surely it is a step too far to make a firm resolution to prioritise oneself over others?
How refreshing it would be to hear of a New Year’s resolution that proposed putting other people’s needs before one’s own. Charity shops would have a queue of volunteers waiting to serve in their stores, all manner of voluntary organisations would welcome with open arms the willing helpers who would come forward, our honorary service would run like clockwork with a wealth of new recruits and the benefits would be felt far and wide.
And then there is another group of people to consider: those who have too much ‘me time’. I’m talking about the elderly, the unwell and the lonely; people who don’t have a choice about the amount of time they spend on their own, because they’re infirm or housebound. They are the ones who would love to forfeit some of their ‘me time’ for the pleasure of some company to break the monotony of the long, lonely hours.
So perhaps there’s a marriage to be made here. If we were all prepared to sacrifice a little of the time we devote to ourselves and share it with people who have spare time in abundance, ultimately we would realise that ‘us time’ is more rewarding than ‘me time’.
To quote Barack Obama, ‘If you go out and make some good things happen, you will fill the world with hope, you will fill yourself with hope.’
Now that’s a decent New Year’s resolution.
